Suicide Prevention: How Can You Help?

Suicide is a topic people prefer not to talk about; but, by not talking about it we are seeing an increase in the occurrence of death by suicide. Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in the United States. This has promoted a social push for prevention and the growing concern to support young people across the country with mental health concerns.
So, what can you do you help someone that may be suicidal?

What can you Do?

Knowing what to do when you suspect or are confronted with suicide can be scary if you aren’t sure what to do. The good news is that people appreciate the care and concern more than you being perfect. Feeling more confident in knowing how to be supportive and compassionate of those you care about or those you come into contact with will benefit you and the person at risk of suicide. To boost your confidence and be more effective start with these four steps:

ASK THE TOUGH QUESTION

ASK: “Are you thinking about suicide?”

Most people are scared to ask someone if they are thinking about suicide for fear of putting the idea into their head. Asking someone about suicide will not cause someone to take their life or even consider suicide. If someone is depressed, the idea of suicide has already come up. By asking this question you show the person that you are willing and able to help them. You will encourage open and direct communication. Direct communication is important to reduce ambiguity. The person at risk needs to hear these words. We need to ask to know if suicide is their intention in order to help.

LISTEN

Now that you have asked, be prepared to listen before jumping into action. While I can understand the desire to prevent, you will be the most helpful if you listen first. Their story will include all their reasons for choosing death and this will help build trust. Listen with compassion and empathy . Do not try to solve their problems or give advice. Encourage them to talk by being curious and asking about their reasons for wanting to die. In opening the conversation the person may express some reasons for wanting to live. You can ask for any reasons they might have for wanting to live and/or support a choice to stay safe. Use statements about hope/ faith, uncertainty, and worry about when they’re gone.

CLARIFY

Get clear about their intention to die by suicide by asking questions about their plan. Being direct is most effective. Here are some example questions to ask:

• Do you have a plan to kill yourself? Have you thought about how you would kill yourself?

• Have you thought of when you are going to take your life?

• How do you plan on taking your life?

• Do you have access to the things you need for your plan? (i.e. gun, ammo, pills, etc.)

• Do you have a backup plan?

CREATE AN ACTION PLAN and GET HELP

You are not required to be the sole person required to keep another person safe.

Create a plan with the person at risk to help keep them safe at that time. This plan will include a designated safety contact person(s) and a way to stop their suicide plan.

Ask if there is a family member or close friend who they feel comfortable talking to and sharing their story with.

Ask for help in making their environment safe and removing means to carry out their plan (If the person at risk is under 18, their parent, guardian or trusted family member should be called with or without permission).
If you are the family member or close friend who has been designated as the safety contact (an adult) then you will put into place the part of the action plan For making their environment safe.
This can mean removing potential weapons and means, as well as connecting them to counselors/ hospitals.
In the event that the safety contact person cannot be reached consider an alternative safety contact and provide the person with a list of resources if you have them (you can use the list below).
Do not leave the person at risk alone.
If the person at risk is uncooperative or you suspect that their risk for suicide is imminent, offer to drive the person at risk to the hospital and call 911.

Do’s and Don’ts

• Do not leave a person at risk for suicide alone, especially if there is still a viable suicide plan in place.

• Your safety is also important. Do not put yourself in danger and call 911 if there are any safety concerns.

• Show them that you care

• Be patient but persistent.

• Don’t try to fix the problems of the person at risk or give advice. Your immediate goal is getting the person to safety. The problems that brought them to this situation can be worked on later.
• The best way to help the person at risk is to listen to them and ask questions leading you to a plan of action promoting safety.

Do They Need your help?

(Risk Factors and Warning Signs)

There is no single cause for suicide. It most often occurs when compounding stressors arise such as health, existing mental health concerns, school/occupational stress, relationship stress, loss, painful event, or change. It should be noted that most people who actively engage in managing mental health symptoms go on to live healthy functioning lives.

Factors to consider:

• Mental health conditions

• Depression

• Anxiety

• Substance use problems

• Bipolar disorder

• Schizophrenia

• Personality traits of aggression, mood changes and poor relationships

• Conduct disorder

• Serious physical health conditions including pain

• Traumatic brain injury

• Access to lethal means including firearms and drugs

• Prolonged stress, such as harassment, bullying, relationship problems or unemployment

• Stressful life events, like rejection, divorce, financial crisis, other life transitions or loss

• Exposure to another person’s suicide, or to graphic or sensationalized accounts of suicide

• Previous suicide attempts

• Family history of suicide

• Childhood abuse, neglect or trauma

Warning signs to consider:

• Talking about/ writing about wanting to die or to kill oneself;

• Looking for a way to kill oneself;

• Talking about feeling hopeless or having no purpose;

• Talking about feeling trapped or being in unbearable pain;

• Talking about being a burden to others;

• Increasing the use of alcohol or drugs;

• Acting anxious, agitated, or reckless;

• Sleeping too little or too much;

• Withdrawing or feeling isolated;

• Showing rage or talking about seeking revenge

• Displaying extreme mood swings

• irrational, impulsive, reckless behavior

• Withdrawing from or losing interest in activities/ decreased work or school performance

• Changes in appetite or significant weight changes

• Visiting or calling people to say goodbye

• Giving away prized possessions

• Sudden improvement or relief

Frequently asked questions

Will talking or asking about suicide cause someone to start thinking about it?
Asking about suicide provides individuals with a safe place to talk about their feelings and enable them to be more comfortable with expressing suicidal thoughts which increases their chances of seeking help.

The person asked me not to tell anyone they’re having thoughts of suicide. Should I keep their secret?
Thoughts of suicide should never be kept secret. The person at risk might get angry at you for telling and you could lose a friend, but their life is more important than keeping a secret. Ask someone you trust for help.

If someone is talking to me about suicide, does that mean that they aren’t serious about killing themselves?
One of the most common warning signs of suicide is talking repeatedly about one’s own death. People who make threats of suicide should be taken seriously and provided the help that they need. Talking about suicide should be taken as a warning sign and mean that suicide presents an imminent risk for that person. It also tells you that the person you are talking to has reasons for wanting to live and is looking for help.

Do people who attempt suicide fully intend to die?
Most individuals do not want suicide to happen. Rather, they are torn between wanting to end their emotional or psychological suffering through death and wanting to continue living, though only in a more hopeful environment.

Can I help someone who is having thoughts of suicide if I’ve never been trained in suicide intervention?
Yes. Individuals at risk for suicide are most likely to approach a family member or friend for help. Those closest to the individual at risk are also most likely to notice warning signs. Compassion goes a long way. Showing care and concern by listening and encouraging the person at risk to seek help from a trained professional can help to save someone’s life.

What should I do if the person I’m helping refuses to get professional help?
People refuse help for many different reasons, like being afraid of what will happen to them, worries about treatment costs, and difficulty asking for help in general. Do not take this as a sign that they don’t want or don’t need help. Continue to talk to them about your concerns for their safety and suggest that a trained professional would be better able to help them. Listen to them and offer to help connect them with a mental health professional or the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-TALK). If you have concerns for their safety, call 911.

I’m concerned about someone but I don’t feel comfortable talking to them about suicide. What should I do?
Talking to someone about suicide can be very difficult, especially if it’s someone we care about. Furthermore, if we ask about suicide, we have to be prepared for the person to say that they are having thoughts. Remember that sometimes the best way to help is just to listen and encourage the person at risk to seek professional help. If you can’t talk to the person at risk about your concerns, reach out to a family member or friend who you trust and disclose your concerns. Ask if they are willing to help you talk to the person at risk.
Most individuals do not want suicide to happen. Rather, they are torn between wanting to end their emotional or psychological suffering through death and wanting to continue living, though only in a more hopeful environment.

What should I do if the person I’m helping refuses to get professional help?
People refuse help for many different reasons, like being afraid of what will happen to them, worries about treatment costs, and difficulty asking for help in general. Do not take this as a sign that they don’t want or don’t need help. Continue to talk to them about your concerns for their safety and suggest that a trained professional would be better able to help them. Listen to them and offer to help connect them with a mental health professional or the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-TALK). If you have concerns for their safety, call 911.

I’m concerned about someone but I don’t feel comfortable talking to them about suicide. What should I do?
Talking to someone about suicide can be very difficult, especially if it’s someone we care about. Furthermore, if we ask about suicide, we have to be prepared for the person to say that they are having thoughts. Remember that sometimes the best way to help is just to listen and encourage the person at risk to seek professional help. If you can’t talk to the person at risk about your concerns, reach out to a family member or friend who you trust and disclose your concerns. Ask if they are willing to help you talk to the person at risk.

Resources:

DOCTOR/COUNSELOR

If you are established with a doctor or counselor, call their office and request an immediate appointment.

SUICIDE PREVENTION LIFELINE:

1-800-273-TALK (8255)
Free, 24-hour hotline.

HOSPITAL ER

You can walk into any hospital ER for assistance.

911

If you can’t reach anyone or get yourself to the ER, call 911 and someone will come to you.

SMARTPHONE APP

• Stay connected when you are having thoughts of suicide with the My3 app.Download the App

ONLINE RESOURCES/READING:

• American Foundation for Suicide Prevention

• Suicide Prevention Lifeline

• The Jason Foundation

• The Jed Foundation

• Helpguide.org

• The Hopeline

HOTLINES:

(800)442-4673
1-800-442-HOPE
(877)838-2838
1-877-Vet2Vet
Veterans peer support line
(800)784-2432
1-800-SUICIDA
Spanish speaking suicide hotline
(877)968-8454
1-877-YOUTHLINE
Teen to teen peer counseling hotline
(800)472-3457
1-800-GRADHLP
Grad student hotline
(800)773-6667
1-800-PPD-MOMS
Post-partum depression hotline

Brynne Angelle is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker in Lafayette, LA providing counseling and therapy services to individuals, teens, and perinatal women. Call today to schedule your appointment. 337-565-0900. Click Here to schedule your appointment.